“It doesn’t interest me to know where you live
or how much money you have.
I want to know if you can get up after the night of grief and despair
weary and bruised to the bone
and do what needs to be done to feed the children.

It doesn’t interest me who you know
or how you came to be here.
I want to know if you will stand in the centre of the fire with me
and not shrink back.

It doesn’t interest me where or with whom
you have studied.
I want to know what sustains you from the inside
when all else falls away.”

“The Invitation” by Oriah Mountain Dreamer
My intention going into this process/project was to commit to doing things I haven’t done, to push the boundaries of my perceptible limitations and to truly dance and trust in the unknown.  I realized the visibly hidden will remain hidden if I continue looking/sensing in the same ways.  This is the first time I’ve ever had to simultaneously produce, market, direct, design, make, choreograph and perform.  It’s a lot of hats to wear and never having worn some, I met failure upon failure upon failure – but every fall and lesson became my greatest investment.  I had to learn to stop fighting the change, to surrender to what is, and leave behind what is not for me.  Acceptance and surrender.  
This is the same approach Charlie and I embraced in the process of composition.  We decided to work with sensors and movement to create composition for the work. Going in, we didn’t know where the process would go and only through making were we able to uncover the work.  Along the way we discovered our own relationships to technology.  What he perceived as a composer and what I perceived as a mover were simultaneously opposite and the same.  At times, we sensed the same felt sensations but we experienced them differently or vice versa. The technology gave us a way to show one another how we embodied the experience of sound. It also gave us a way to connect as the Universal Self, a co-composition of energies and forces composing with us. And as a result of being able to converse in this way, it has expanded our way of seeing, listening and feeling.
This process was neither straight nor linear but rather, a witnessing of multidimensional spheres in a dance of seeking that which harmonizes with itself. And in the act of surrender and participation as the Universal Self, we witnessed the harmonizing of the spheres informing a deeper and more entangle connection we could’ve never planned or forseen. 

Upon Reflection:
“If you do not trust life to unfold, the mind takes over and it becomes a game of strategy, motivated by anxiety.  This mistrust is unfair. Life has given us so much, and yet we do not trust it.” 
There is a familiarity in the discomfort in the process of making requiring me to lean into the questions and the chaos of the unknown. As much as the self at the center gets caught up in trying to find the answers, there are greater forces and energies involved in this dance of creation.  Maybe someday, with enough experience, I’ll live into the answers and maybe they’ll just lead to better questions, either way the process continues to unravel the visibly hidden. 

Side Note Story: 
Charlie and I met on the first day and we just so happened to sit next to one another. Within a day, we had a project in the works.  
Life has many wild cards, some more wild than others, for me it’s a daily practice to remember we are always where we are meant to be.  Perception is a subjective and an embodied experience, a dance where darkness and light, matter and energy, and the self at the center and the Universal Self meet.  The path of life is neither straight or narrow, it is simultaneously complex and simple, falling apart and falling into place, never still and always in motion. In the impermanent flow and movement of life, there is so much more than our eyes can perceive.  As we all continue to evolve our sense-ability to the visibly hidden, may the mysteries of life effortlessly remind us that and maybe, we’re all a lot more interconnected than we think. 
Thank you for joining me on this journey! I’m so grateful our paths have crossed and I look forward to connecting with you at the showings.
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